Monday, October 26, 2009

The Track Record Update: Ray Crowe--Who Is This Guy, Anyway? The Bigfoot Bar and Grill; Sexsquatchploitation and Scatology in Human Culture; Nights with Sasquatch

So, who IS this Ray Crowe, anyway? In his time in the bigfooting field he was not just a bigfoot hunter, but an editor, event organizer, field investigator, and generalized paranormalist and Fortean. He co-founded The Western Bigfoot Society, but he was also interested in all things that go bump in the night or hoot and howl in the forest. Though Ray was a serious researcher of the Sasquatch, he also found time for literary pursuits, and as well for the pursuit of things that were just downright strange. It should be noted that Ray did not necessarily agree with every theory or sighting he published. He kept an open mind, but always "kept his skepticals on."

In the Index of the newly released THE TRACK RECORD on CD we find entries on Rip Van Winkle, Spam, Sea Monkies, Plesiosaurus, UFOs, Mothman, Men in Black (MIBs), Mars, Loch Ness, Little People, Adolf Hitler, Goat Suckers, Fate Magazine, Cyclops, Bob Dylan, Art Bell, Crop Circles, Crystal Skulls, Bubonic Plague, Alien Implants, and of course Bigfoot Tampons, Bigfoot Testicles, Bigfoot Telepathy, Bigfoot Sexual Abuse of Other Animals, Bigfoot Orbs, Multi-Dimensional Bigfoot, Bigfoot Marijuana Eating, the Bigfoot Army, Bigfoot Lost Time, Bigfoot Electricity Stops Functioning, Bigfoot Conspiracy, and let's not forget... Bigfoot Attracted Sexually to Humans. Far out stuff! But there is a lot of down-to-earth information in there, too... like Bigfoot Scat, and.... OK, I'll stop.

Besides The Track Record (see our Previous Post: now released on CD!), his apparently humorously-intended fictional work, "The Bigfoot Bar and Grill," tells the tale of bigfoot rape of a human female, the quest for revenge, along with a lot of strangely scatological humor at the expense of some redneck country folk bigfoot hunter characters. See the two scanned sample sections below, click to ENLARGE.

Image above, the book now in possession of Bigfoot Books, with sunfaded cover. To left, from a t-shirt of the Western Bigfoot Society. This image and others following of Ray Crowe had to be lifted from the fine video, SASQUATCH ODYSSEY. See our previous POST.

 [WARNING!: Some, or most, or all of the quotations that follow are of a GROTESQUE, SICKLY HUMOROUS and sometimes HORRIFIC nature, not to be read by young folks and the faint of heart, or adults who might just happen to have GOOD TASTE. They involve vast quantities of bodily excreta, as well as scenes of involuntary interspecies miscegenation. They are presented here for purposes of literary and historical analysis only!!! Note: Poooz, the character found below, is a member of a clan of Sasquatches.]

Sample quotes from The Bigfoot Bar and Grill:

"In some places that the Bigfoot visited frequently, a reek would fill the air, the stench so bad that humans almost needed a gas-mask to enter the area with... if you could find anybody foolish enough to enter the gut-wrenching stench anyway. Coming around the huge tree, Poooz almost ran into the female 'skin.' It startled him so much that he screamed in fear, 'Aiiiieeee!' dropping a handful of bear grass, turning in his fear to escape. Goldie surprised and terrified, screamed also, scared as much by the beast as its own surprised scream of terror. She had been bent over a log, doing her morning thing, and had just finished wiping; Levi's on the ground next to her, panties around her ankles, paperback romance novel in hand, when the monster appeared. She was so startled and frightened that she never screamed so loud in her life, running stocking-foot towards her tent, she left her pants, boots, and toilet paper on the ground. Realizing that the startling, screaming apparition was 'only' a skin, Poooz reacted in an instant... rushed over and grabbed the screaming and fleeing skin by her hair and an arm, kicked her feet apart, and jammed his organ into her from the rear end. She coughed and choked, then continued screaming, and wiggling to get away. The motion excited him all the more, and he hugged her closer, sinking even deeper into her. Goldie fought and scratched and bit and kicked, but soon found the harder she fought, the more the monster seemed to squirt into her. Going limp she slumped to the ground to play opossum, and she felt a final deep thrust, and a swelling between her legs... bigger and bigger. Poooz felt himself swelling, and knew that he was through. Later on, his engorged penis, almost the size of a small baseball... nature's way of insuring that an unappreciative female couldn't escape before the sperm impregnated her, would shrink again, and he could let the skin go free, of no further interest to him. Goldie felt the swelling and felt helpless. Starting to panic again at this evil smelling monster that was raping her, she again started struggling... harder than ever... and screaming louder... louder than ever." Hearing the ruckus and commotion, several of the clan wandered over to see what was happening. They quickly lost interest when they saw that Poooz was only relieving himself with a skin, and wandered off again, hunting for something more entertaining, or something to nibble. Poooz felt the skin start to try and wiggle free again. Knowing she was firmly impaled, he released her, and she fought even harder, and he found himself getting excited again. Grabbing her again, and pulling her thrashing body tightly against his swollen member, he could feel himself squirting again and again. He released her to thrash some more, which she did, and he squirted again. Never before had he squirted so much at one time. Exhausted, Goldie fell into a near faint, though still aware of the tremendous pressure in her crotch, she knew there was nothing she could do about it, but kept screaming anyway. Ramming his thing in harder and harder again and again, trying to make himself squirt even more, Poooz eventually tired after the skin fainted and quit moving. Forty-five minutes later he finally felt himself shrinking, and let Goldie tumble to the ground. Thinking nothing more of the skin, Poooz wandered off in search of the clan, completely satisfied. Tonight he wouldn't have to sing."

And then, later...
"Before Mary could hush him Joe burst out with, "a Bigfoot just raped Goldie." "No shit! So what's everybody waitin' for then... let's go kill the son-of-a-bitch," shouted Tom, crushing his empty Coors can, and pitching it at a cardboard cutout picture of a Bigfoot standing in the corner."

And there is this fine description, from a later page:

"There was another terrifying, hair-raising scream.... There was a twelve foot monster, screaming to high heaven, running at them from 100 feet away. Calvin stood, his mouth gaping. Steve and Jeff just sat there, cups in hand, staring unbelievingly. Hank reach for his rifle, but stumbled and fell over. Tom was more practical in his instant reaction. He turned and ran, brown blobs coming out his pants cuffs, hair looking like it had turned permanently white. Jeff turned to see that the commotion was, soup dripping from his chin when he turned too fast.
The monster leaped over the group, an Olympic jump of 25 feet, and chased after Tom, screaming in the most spine-tingling shriek anybody had ever heard. Mary calmly picked up her rifle before anybody else could react to the surprise attack, let the safety off, took and held half a breath, centered the sight on Poooz's back, and calmly pumped three rounds off. There were three puffs of dust and blood, all in about the space a saucer would cover, right in the center of the animals back. Poooz staggered, veered away from the frantically running and stumbling and pissing and shitting and crying Tom, and disappeared in the brush to the left. Mary said in a controlled voice, "he's hit bad... lets go before he gets away." Where the monster had been shot there was a large spatter of blood on the ground, and bits of lung tissue. Mary started off on the trail, Hank, Steve, and Jeff close behind. Calvin stopped for more samples. Tom was still helpless on the ground, rolling and groaning in his own shit. Noticing he was being left behind though, he crawled briefly towards the rapidly retreating group, then stumbled to his feet and followed, staggering along, his boots squishing from his own excreta and piss."

GHASTLY! TORRID! HORRID! Ray, what were you thinking? Maybe these were written with the intent of descriptive vérité, based upon encounters and sighting reports? We may never know... and do we WANT to?
(published June 1991, Western Bigfoot Society)

Click Text Images to Enlarge! Other text image: the Western Bigfoot Society info. sheet found in Bigfoot Bar and Grill.

Throughout the publication run of his newsletter Ray Crowe fielded information and letters from the infamous hoaxer and possible nutjob Bigfoot "contactee," Ray Wallace. He once said, ""Ray's contribution was study into the actual behavior of Bigfoot, what it eats, how it acts." David Paulides has said he may publish some of these letters, now in the possession of NABS. That should be very... interesting, indeed!

A very interesting article on Bigfoot and bigfooting at the time, the late 1990s or so, was written by Robert Sullivan and published in OPEN SPACES QUARTERLY, Volume One, Number Three. Read it HERE. There are some interesting bits about Ray Crowe and his Bigfoot group, excerpts following.... We quote:

"In many ways, the Western Bigfoot Society is typical of the Northwest's numerous grass-roots Bigfoot organizations. It counts about forty people as members and meets on the last Thursday of every month in the basement of Ray Crowe's store, Ray's Used Books, just outside Portland, Oregon. Ray has decorated the meeting room with a mixture of large footprint casts, oddly twisted willow branches, a 21.6 cm. strand of cinnamon-colored hair, maps of nearby wilderness areas, with pins marking recent Bigfoot sightings, and tabloid headlines that the group finds humorous ( "Beautiful Women Help to Lure Bigfoot," reads one. "Sasquatch Likes to Study the Ladies."). Lately, Ray has taken to putting up photos from the group's occasional field trips, like the one to the nearby Primate Research Center, in Beaverton, Oregon, or the one to the Trojan Nuclear Power Plant, in Rainier, Oregon, where Ray thinks the buzz of the power lines may act as a lure.

In the past, speakers at the meetings have included a dog trainer, who addressed Bigfoot's fear of dogs (a phenomenon often mentioned at Ray's meetings); a member of a local search-and-rescue team, who said that the media had neglected to mention that a three-year-old boy whom he rescued in the summer of 1989 from the forests around Mount Hood had credited a "large hairy man" for keeping him company during the long night; and a former paramilitary officer with the National Security Agency, who, on a top-secret mission somewhere in the rainforests of Mato Grosso, Brazil, photographed what he now thinks must have been a Sasquatch, only to have the film confiscated by higher-ups. On one occasion Ray even invited a U.F.O. expert who is a vocal proponent of the theory that Sasquatches have come from another world--a postulate that the W.B.S. as a group opposes. "They may be full of poop," Ray said, "but I figure I might as well let them have their say."

Like most part-time Bigfoot investigators, Ray, who is now fifty-five, got into Bigfoot hunting by accident; he was doing research for a novel that included a Sasquatch rape scene and then decided to research the Sasquatch beyond the scope of the book. Shortly afterward, in 1991, he founded the W.B.S., and then began The Track Record, a monthly newsletter containing Bigfoot gossip, inspirational quotes, and the latest sighting information people have related to Ray. Once in a while, Ray publishes letters, like the one that Erik Beckjord, director of the U.F.O. and Bigfoot Museum, in Malibu, California, sent him, which complimented the W.B.O.'s work, or the letter that Ray himself sent to the United States Forest Service, citing the Freedom of Information Act and demanding to see the Mount Hood National Forest rangers' Bigfoot log book, if it exists. (Ray thinks the rangers may keep a log of Bigfoot sightings.) A few years ago, on a spring evening, Ray had his first Sasquatch "experience," as he calls it, which began when he accidentally scared an elk away from his camp, at the end of an old logging road. "I was getting ready for dinner and while I'm standing there I hear what sounded like these two giant birds arguing," he told me. "I say arguing, but they were chattering, really. And, anyway, I just assume that they were two Bigfoot, just arguing with each other-p.o'd at me for losing their elk for dinner."

For historical flavor, here is the SCHEDULE OF EVENTS from the year 2000 BIGFOOT DAZE celebration. See how much FUN they had back then!!!
Friday Evening, August 25th:
Many people will gather to get camp sites for tents or RV?s ($5.00 night), some staying at nearby motels. We visit into the night. No fires though, fire marshal wont let us have them.

Saturday Morning, August 26th:
10AM - 12 Noon - trip to Stevenson?s Columbia River Interpretive Center Museum
( rate though). See geology and history of area and a history film clip that has Bigfoot included as local historical subject.
Following the museum, a short trip up Rock Creek in Stevenson to see the petrified forest....pick up some pieces of a fossil tree to take home.
Break for lunch - Browse for sale memorabilia tables.
Saturday Afternoon 2PM - Listen to Speakers at Bigfoot Campground. Several possible have been invited (WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE A SPEAKER?), but confirmation is slow. Thom Powell will talk about the Bigfoot Research Organization (BFRO).
5 PM - Break for dinner.
7:30 PM - Cascade Trio Bigfoot Stomp Dance Contest.

Sunday Morning, August 27th:
10AM - Magician performs magic show for children along with bible school. Children's drawing of Bigfoot contest, visit, browse memorabilia tables. Rob Butler will have a family of life-size Bigfoot plywood cutouts to view, etc..
11AM - Larry Lund will demonstrate how to make plaster track impressions.
11:30 AM - Retired Fish and Wildlife Expert Jim Hewkin (not confirmed yet) will display a rare collection of seven plaster tracks made by a single creature from near Colton, OR, 1968. Many other tracks and hand prints of Bigfoot will be displayed also.
12 Noon - Sally Newcomer will have a Bigfoot Family in costumes. How they live, twist trees, stack stones, wood-on-wood. Her costumes were a hit last year as ladies got married to Bigfoot.?
12 Noon - Bigfoot Chili Cook-Off...prize to best judged chili entry.
12 Noon - (unassigned speaker...invited) will have a barefoot person walk across a sandbox and explain the physics of tracks...lift off, pressure ridges, and such.
Contest...prize to entry with the biggest foot (Sally has measuring board).
1PM - Bigfoot Potlatch Lunch (Pot-Luck)...Bigfoot burgers by camp hosts Harry and Donna Schumacher, Abominable Potato Salad and Yeti Spaghetti by Theata Crowe, Ray will bring a couple of watermelons...others, please bring some food items to share for the lunch. Thanks!
2 PM - Contest Bigfoot Yells/Screams...prize to best noise, judged and taped, prizes.
2:30 PM - Contest best homemade Bigfoot Costume prize.
3:00 PM - Bigfoot race...teams with giant feet strapped to feet will compete for various prizes.
5:00 PM - End of Bigfoot Daze.
Ray Crowe images above: Ray on expedition; Ray at Mt. Saint Helens, looking for volcanically preserved Bigfoot remains cooked in solidified ash; Ray caving, exploring the possibility that Sasquatches live in old lava tubes; Ray speaking at Bigfoot Daze, WA, circa 1998.

The odd Bigfoot-human encounters depicted in Ray Crowe's fiction were part of the inspiration for the brilliantly bad film, Ape Canyon, by ex-Humboldter Jon Olsen. In fact, we obtained our Bigfoot Books copy from the filmmaker himself. Also influential for Olsen was The Redneck Manifesto: How Hillbillies, Hicks, and White Trash Became America's Scapegoats. Excerpts from the book HERE. See our brief Previous Post on this matter.

Let's not forget that Dave Paulides, in The Hoopa Project, has put forth the proposition that there has been genetic co-mingling between human and bigfoot, and not just in some ancient time, but fairly recently according to certain Native American accounts.

And now more, along the same lines, so long as we are talking about it and have surely offended nearly every reader at this point....

NOW READING: NIGHTS WITH SASQUATCH, a truly abominable, supposedly "true" tale, "An Explosive Ordeal of Rape and Revenge Beyond Any Woman's Experience," as the cover reads. This book is, as Joshua Blu Buhs (who sold us the book) says, is "truly skeevy." From the inside endpage, ""Does Sasquatch exist? The terrifying truth behind the ancient legend. A team of young scientists sets out to explore the Northwest Mountains. Both John Cotter and Judith Frankle were trained level-headed observers with liberated views on life and love. Until they confronted Sasquatch--a half-human monster who claimed Judith as his captive mate. This is the explosive novel of a woman forced to endure barbaric, sexual lusts beyond any human experience. And a man driven by revenge... The Sensational Shock-A-Page Novel." And, from the back cover, "Judith Frankle was a perfect specimen of the modern female, able to handle sophisticated lab data and lecherous young men with equal ease. She loved the wild freedom of roaming the mountains with her man, sharing the rugged pleasures of nature. But no woman, or man, could control the primitive terror that stalked her. A half-human beast whose brutal lusts stripped every vestige of civilization from her soul. Lusts that transformed Judith Frankle into a shameless savage desperately battling to survive her shocking... Nights with Sasquatch." In a Publisher's Note, in a desperate attempt to add  faux credibility to this otherwise base and horribly bad sexsquatchploitation: "For a complete technical report of the encounter described in this article the reader is referred to Dr John Cotter's "Pleistocene Man-Ape Link Survives in Canadian Wilderness," Journal of Mammology Volume MXIV June, 1976. Also a forthcoming treatise by Judith Frankle Cotter, PhD., in the distinguished British Journal, New Scientist: "Existence of Mythological Primate Confirmed." The following account is the first publication on the subject for General Readers."

EGADS! Take this one with a grain of salt, or at least some humor, if you can.
(Berkley Medallion Books, New York, 1977.)

It would seem that Bigfoot-Sasquatch bears, as a cultural motif, all that humans see as low and unbearable in themselves. It is a little unfair to place all this nastiness on the poor forest-dwelling hominoids. Perhaps it is we who are low and beastly, and they who are good, free and Noble? Bigfoot is like a scapegoat. We humans are the ones ruled by or at least deeply influenced by "base" impulses. Wild creatures cannot be said to be base; but we are conscious of our motivations, and have ideas and perversions surrounding them. BF just shits in the woods and moves on; he/she does not get a Freudian complex about it. We at once project outwardly and thereby deny deep and hidden truths about ourselves, all while using Sasquatch secretly as a means of self-knowledge. Or something like that. We are able to indirectly admit how odd and ape-like we are through the Bigfoot proxy. The real Bigfoot surely just laughs, and moves deeper into the woods. We'd write more of this now, but it would give away too much of our current back-of-the-mind book writing project.

"In that article human friend Steve read to me, when I come steal beer from him back porch, Peter Byrne, human guy who look for me for many years and never see me say (me use cut-and-paste here), 'There are a number of rivalries in the Bigfoot field. Their principal basis is of course the belief that at the end of the Bigfoot rainbow there lies a pot of gold. ...[h]ad they over the years projected a fraction of the time and money that they spend vilifying each other on Bigfoot research [they] would surely have solved the mystery by now.' Me also hear that Professor Krantz say, 'You have to watch out, because there's a lot of backstabbing.' Once me thinking of contact human, give up old game of hiding in trees, but then me hear them talk around campfire (me hear everything, you no hear me) about other human bigfoot hunter dudes. Me hear bad words, like 'liar, fake, fraud, not a real bigfoot hunter, non-believer, @#$%ing cult, boy scout type, city boy, effeminate, gay, nerd, internet geek, guano fanatical cult freak violence threatening footer geek loser thug'---stuff like that, mean, bad words. Me quote real human word me really hear. Me feel anger! Me want smash little human heads. Give ass whoopin'! Me decide never talk with human. They probably say me smell real bad, too, but me I like the smell of me. Me think human stink like bad milk and stinky fake flowery soap smell. Me say human get them shit together and maybe then me come and hang out at Bluff Creek Louse Camp. I talk about that poopy and sexy stuff I just see above in me next Bigfoot Speak.Watch out suckah hu-man!"

BIGFOOT BOOKS: Well, we tried to stop A.G.F. ranting like that, but he demands the truth or justice or something like that come out. Personally, I've found the BF community to be quite convivial and familial, one where one can make instant friends across vast distances. The BF world is full of smart, friendly, independent, fun-loving folks; quite the opposite, I've found, of the redneck stereotype. But like many (most?) families, there are dysfunctionalities which arise. Folks, these need to end. Keep your eyes on the prize! Keep the following in mind....
"The gift of collaboration is greater than the gift of competition."
--Tracy Morgan, comedian, heard on NPR, "Fresh Air," 2009

Read the interesting Sasquatch Odyssey film diary here: Ray Crowe and the "Four Horsemen of Bigfooting" are all in there. If you don't have this documentary, get it now. It is very funny, but also documents the early generation of Bigfooters before that era ended and internet-influenced Bigfootology began.

We're just now starting the Daniel Perez interview process. Give us at least a week until it appears here!
Also, Coming Soon: "The Not-so Good, the Truly Bad, and the Hideously Ugly": three awful Bigfoot/Sasquatch movies viewed recently, and somewhat reluctantly.


  1. Hmm... What I'm wondering is where people get the ideas to write such works of fiction? Why do they think they have to write in such an immature manner about Bigfoot just because it may be a 'phenomenon'? But, then again, they don't write the same things about Dodos, extinct dinosaurs, and wooly mammoths...

    Sorry to ramble, it merely strikes me as odd that people should write such novels :)

    I enjoy reading your blog, btw.

  2. Hi Nerdy! Bigfoot is like a scapegoat. We humans are the ones ruled by or at least deeply influenced by "base" impulses. Wild creatures cannot be said to be base; but we are conscious of our motivations, and have ideas and perversions surrounding them. BF just shits in the woods and moves on; he/she does not get a Freudian complex about it. We at once project outwardly and thereby deny deep and hidden truths about ourselves, all while using Sasquatch secretly as a means of self-knowledge. Or something like that. We are able to indirectly admit how odd and ape-like we are through the Bigfoot proxy. The real Bigfoot surely just laughs, and moves deeper into the woods.


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